Reflections On The Gaza Crisis: Communicating With Empathy As An Ally
Author: Chelsea Osei, Reg. CASLPO Speech Language Pathologist
Date: Wednesday, February 21, 2024
Table of Contents
Supporting clients in vocalizing allyship
Genuine vs. performative allyship
Communicating with empathy
Discussing the crisis in Gaza at work
Conclusion
supporting clients in vocalizing allyship
As I write this article in February 2024, the world is at war. Israel and Palestine. Russia and Ukraine. The war in Sudan. Hundreds of thousands of innocent lives have been lost. I have personally felt the struggle of wanting to say something, but then worrying about who I might offend in the process and how saying something unintentionally offensive or triggering to another, might impact my professional obligations to remain neutral. I am sure many professionals also face the same dilemma.
As a speech-language pathologist, I do wonder what differentiates those successful communicators from those who are less successful in communicating on emotionally-charged issues. Likewise, how can I support my clients in vocalizing their allyship wherever they stand on various geopolitical issues and current events in a professional, respectful, and productive manner? And lastly, how can we, using communication, reduce the risk of being sanctioned, lashed, or doxxed for engaging in dialogue?
Genuine vs. performative allyship
Allyship describes efforts by individuals and groups of people in supporting and advocating for the rights of marginalized or underrepresented communities. Allyship can take many forms. In the context of the Gaza crisis, it can look like writing letters to your political leaders demanding a ceasefire, going to protests with your friends, engaging with Palestinian art and journalism, or donating to organizations that are providing humanitarian aid to Gazans. There are many different ways that you can show up as an ally, as long as it is ongoing and genuine. The issue of performative allyship often comes up when addressing social, political and cultural issues. A contemporary context in which allyship was accused of being performative is Blackout Tuesday, a day in June 2020 when millions of Instagram users shared black squares along with hashtags like #BlackoutTuesday and #BlackLivesMatter. This campaign was originally organized within the music industry by music executives Brianna Agyemang and Jamila Thomas, but it quickly became a widespread internet trend that received criticism from many activists. Some say it diverted attention away from important resources and information related to the Black Lives Matter movement. Critics argued that posting black squares on social media platforms, while well-intentioned, could be seen as performative without meaningful action or engagement in addressing systemic issues of racism. Blackout Tuesday sparked a lot of important conversations about what genuine vs. performative allyship looks like, and these conversations are still relevant today when discussing the genocide in Palestine.
To be a genuine ally, it is important to engage in an ongoing process of self-awareness, education, and active support. Doing some self-directed learning is a great start. Learn about the issues faced by marginalized communities and the history behind them. Pay attention to the experiences and concerns of those you aim to support by listening actively to their perspectives and their stories. Spend time amplifying marginalized voices by using your platforms, either on social media or in other relevant spaces. Challenge biases by speaking out against discrimination when you encounter it. Taking on a humble attitude is also crucial - acknowledge that you may not fully understand the experiences of others and remain open to feedback. If you have privilege in certain ways, use it to advocate for those who may not benefit from the same advantages. Diversify your social network by forming genuine connections with people from different backgrounds who can shift your perspective. Your willingness to learn will help you thrive as an ally.
Communicating with Empathy
Empathy goes a long way in any conversation. In this article about Communication Skills and their Importance, it says "it is essential to empathize and show an understanding attitude in conversations. It helps in building relationships with others. Showing empathy to someone while speaking with them makes the speaker more approachable and creates a positive perception about the speaker. It is important to show empathy even when you are speaking in a situation where speech is more professional or formal."
Communicating with empathy involves actively listening, acknowledging emotions, and responding with understanding. In this article on Active Listening, it says "Sometimes we just have to validate the person's emotions even if we have a different perspective or do not agree with what the person is saying. Validation still shows that you are trying to take in and understand their perspective, this allows for the speaker to feel understood and not like they are being judged." Showing genuine concern for the other person's perspective is an important part of being an empathetic communicator. Focus on what the other person is saying without interrupting. Demonstrate that you are fully engaged in the conversation using your body language: maintain eye contact, nod occasionally, avoid crossing your arms (as this may signal defensiveness or disinterest), limit distractions (put away your phone and minimize fidgeting if possible). You can also practice reflective listening - reflect back what you've heard to confirm understanding and convey that you are attentive to their words. Avoid judgement and refrain from criticizing or offering immediate solutions; sometimes people just need to be heard. Express understanding by validating others' feelings. Ask open-ended questions to encourage the person to share more about their feelings and experiences. When appropriate, you can share your own feelings or experiences to create a sense of mutual understanding.
Discussing the crisis in Gaza at work
Having political conversations at work can be intimidating. One of the reasons for this is because our social network at work may be comprised of people at different levels of friendship. Some people may just be acquaintances, so it is easier to keep banter light and impersonal. Many people avoid confrontation at work for fear of how it could negatively impact their reputation and jeopardize their work relationships. Power dynamics at work can also intimidate people and deter them from speaking their minds. Employees who are lower in the organizational hierarchy may feel that their opinions won't be valued or taken seriously by those in positions of power, leading to reluctance in sharing their thoughts. They may even feel that they could be jeopardizing their job security by speaking up about political issues, especially if they believe their views differ from those in power. If you are a leader at your workplace, you can focus on creating a culture that encourages open communication, values diverse perspectives, and ensures that employees feel safe expressing their thoughts without fear of reprisal. If you're feeling compelled to discuss the Gaza crisis at work, it will be important to understand your work culture. Some organizations may discourage discussions around politics. If this is not the case for your organization, make sure that you are choosing the right setting for political discussions. For example, it may be wise to have your discussion in a designated break area, where those who aren't interested in participating in the discussion can easily avoid it.
In this article called "Why Is Conflict So Difficult, and What Can I Do About It?", it talks about why conflict is stressful and describes the "fight, flight, or freeze" response: "If you enter the “fight” response, you are likely to push back aggressively at the source of the conflict, regardless of the intent of the person who began the conversation. The “flight” response leads to passivity – either by ignoring a problem so that conflict can be avoided, or by giving in quickly in order to escape the situation. The “freeze” response leads to complete withdrawal or disengagement." Different people will respond to conflict in different ways, so sometimes it may seem easier to just avoid the conflict altogether. However, conflict can be positive when managed constructively. It can lead to increased understanding by bringing underlying issues to the surface. It can result in personal growth by providing an opportunity for individuals to develop better communication and problem-solving skills. It can also strengthen work relationships by fostering trust, open communication and mutual respect. Using strategies mentioned above for communicating with empathy can ensure that conflict is addressed in a respectful and productive way.
Conclusion
Mastering the art of empathetic communication is crucial to having political discussions at work. If you struggle with engaging in conflict or with demonstrating empathy in conversation, then speaking with an SLP could be beneficial for you. An initial consultation can also help answer any additional questions you might have. There is also the option of considering one of WELL SAID's online Communication Masterclasses to take at your own pace.
To speak with a psychotherapist or one of the speech-language pathologists at Well Said: Toronto Speech Therapy, schedule an initial consultation by clicking the link below or calling (647) 795-5277.
